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£3.99It’s not really a card for any occasion, although does that technically make it a card for any occasion? Anyway, some people might get a little chuckle out of this rather crude little joke, so we’ve put it on a card.
£3.99This Father’s Day, remind daddy dearest that you owe him a lot. You’re really grateful for your life, and you appreciate the fact you came straight from his balls.
£3.99Alright, this one’s only for those with a darker sense of humour. For the love of God, don’t buy this card if you don’t think the person receiving it will find it funny.
£3.99Cancer is a bitch. Tell it to fuck right off with this card. Unfortunately, it won’t do anything to cure cancer, but fuck it, it might bring some spirits up.
£3.99So much attitude in this world. Look, we were (most) all shot through a vagina at one point, covered in blood and shit and everything else that birthing entails. Use someone’s birthday to bring them down a peg or two. Celebrate the day your brother/sister/parent/grandparent/neighbour was expelled from a vagina…
£3.99No one likes cancer. That should go without saying. But if you have someone dealing with the happy horse shit that is cancer, show them your support with this blunt card.
£3.99Are emos still a thing these days? You’ll have to forgive this elderly lady. The 2000’s were such a long time ago, but they’ve never really left me.
£3.99You could buy this for your girlfriend, if you wanted to spend an evening sleeping in the spare room. Alternatively, buy it for a friend whose devil-may-care lifestyle well into her 30’s is admirable, if not just a little awkward at this point.
£3.99Breaking up is no fun at all. Help your friend or loved one get through the tough times by letting them know their ex didn’t deserve them.
£3.99Getting old is no fun. Let your significant other know that it’s okay that you’re going to get all old and gross and wrinkly and fat. Because the important thing is you’re doing it together.